I thought I’d take a break from the usual routine to share with you all a running list I’ve been keeping since the advent of this blog. It’s been one of my least expected (and most delightful) sources of amusement from running CCIQ.
Said list documents all the strange and sometimes disturbing search terms that have led people to my blog.
As any fellow blogger knows, reviewing these searches can be a fun way to kill time when you should be writing a post instead. Not only is it entertaining to see the odd array of searches that somehow point people to you; it can also be amusing (-slash-disturbing) that people are even running some of these searches to begin with.
So, here for your reading pleasure, I’d like to share some of my favorites (with occasional commentary). More to come the next time the list gets sizeable again.
“why do brussel sprouts make me feel so good?”
[and the closely related] “brussel sprout mystery”
“what’s the deal with the panda hat giant?”
“medicine hat couponing”
“Cordelia needs a job”
“I need some free money hello”
“I’m not supposed to be normal” [hell yeah!]
“snooze button I will not give in to you”
“bipolar a little” [why yes, sir, I am!]
“what lies beneath the Vatican movie” [I see where this is coming from but find it amusing nonetheless]
“imaginary friend cheese hat”
“called it quits an hour ago. be careful”
“Everett Bogue idiot?” [I’ve found his direction a little too existential for my tastes since he ended Far Beyond the Stars, but I wouldn’t go that far…]
“Cordelia’s mom” [your mom!]
“I’ve become a complete moron but”
“I mean all the awesome and cool kids are” […Are what? Reading my blog, I presume…]
“I’m not telling you cos you will find it” [o.k., this so makes me want to know what “it” is (and where it is)]
“hem pants husband’ [yeah, husband!]
“I am not Cordelia”
Mildly Disturbing Searches
“Cordelia sucks” [hey!]
“dreams of being caught doing a crime”
“I want to paralyze myself?” [at least they put in the question mark?]
“I want to punch my sister”
“I want to punch my baby”
“why can’t I stop doing the middle finger”
“guess who I am (I just added you on FB)” [this one has a little too much of the stalker flavor about it for my liking]
Truly WTF? Searches
“I have a lot of random rocks and boulders” [good for you?]
“mobile home Cordelia”
“711 in Cordelia”
“Argentina vacation packages”
“why can false eyelashes be dangerous?”
“Cordelia flood zone”
“Cordelia spanking Chelsea” [Chelsea, I am so very, very sorry for this one]
“ah shit you”
“mother overpants” [again, so curious to learn the story behind this one]
What About You?
O.k., so I already know that Abby’s search terms kick my ass a dozen ways to Wednesday (follow her on Facebook for occasional search term updates). But for the rest of you bloggers, what have your favorite search term lead-ins been?
Or, if you’re one of the people who happened to find me through one of the searches above, feel free to explain yourself and/or let me know if my site provided any assistance to you with your needs. (Seriously, “mother overpants” guy. I am so talking to you.)
Never miss a post! Sign up here and get a free copy of Your Guide to Calling It Quits.