Not to say I will spend more at stores that are overpriced and give me food and wine to make me feel good, but I refuse to go to stores that sell small sizes that I would have worn as an under-weight and inappropriate teenager.
I only shop at these stores because they are inexpensive and I can find pieces like blazers and skinny jeans, which are hard to for me to afford anywhere else. For some messed-up reason, I feel that is the definition of frugal.
I Feel Fat
In spite of any savings I might get, these places make me feel fat when I wear the Large or Extra-Large that they never have in stock. Just seeing styles stocked in only sizes 2, 4, 6, or even 8 makes me feel fat.
I cannot fit into an 8 or 10. Maybe a 12 if it’s stretchy, but nothing is stretchy—not the way it needs to be. I know I’m not fat, but only those stores can make those emotions come out. I don’t know why my frugal mind does not get that my emotional mind is more important and I can go without some clothes.
I Am Actually Very Much in Shape
For my age and height, I’m a decent weight, and pretty fit as I ride my bike often to deal with daily stress in life. I run occasionally and might start more if only to fulfill a New Year’s goal. (I hate running.) I love dance video games and getting outdoors, and I can run through Denver International Airport with 15 minutes to get from the ticket counter to the airplane before it closes early (with bags).
I have to say I am in shape and feel good, so I need to stop letting these stores control my feelings.
Every time I go into one of these stores looking for a deal in search of something I could wear for work or fun, but I always end up feeling unhappy. But stores cannot control my feelings. No one can; only I can control my thoughts and feelings. I’ll quit fashion all together if it makes me feel bad about myself in any way—I quit their e-mails and Facebook posts, their coupons and advertisements, I quit trying to squeeze into something someone else thinks is cute. I quit cute.
I Choose to Be Me
So, I choose to spend my money elsewhere. In stores that do not make me feel bad—in stores that get I am frugal, but that I also love to look good. There are so many stores out there; I can select as I please. I do not have to pick the inexpensive ones that just came to town. I can pick whichever ones I want.
I know I am a strong, lovely, logical, intelligent person. No one can control that, so why should I let something like clothes have control over me? Instead, I choose to be happy, healthy, and beautiful while being the best “me” I can be.
LB is currently a 4.0 student working towards a dual bachelor’s and master’s degree in business management. She writes about her struggles using a $50,000 income to pay for school, give back to the community and find time to live life while staying out of debt. Check out more at The Financial Black Sheep.
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